SitRep Saturday: Work, Work, Work

Yet another super productive week. I have four of the five stories for the new anthology drafted and ready for editing, I have the book cover, I have some meta for the anthology (I started the summary, I know who the target audience is, I started the marketing plan, that sort of thing) and I'm looking at a timeline for release that is reasonable and manageable.

In fact, I have a timeline for the next five books. Three of those five books are outlined and/or action drafted and all of them are plotted. So that's pretty cool.

I've been working like mad. So much writing. So. Much. Writing. I haven't written fewer than about 3,000 words a day all week. I've also been researching. Not too much, mind, but enough to get the outlines and action-drafts done. Real research comes during the drafting process and then even more comes during editing.

And reading! I've been finishing about two books a week lately. Right now I'm in the middle of War Brides and I just downloaded Fifty Shades of Alice in Wonderland. I let the "being a reader" part of being a writer slip for far too long.

I am also beta-reading for a friend. She has this massive fantasy epic she's been working on for years and she just sent me the first installment. I'm a thorough, brutal beta, so it's slow going, but it feels good to be beta-reading for someone talented and skilled.

Nine Writing Things: Sexytimes

Sex in fiction is a touchy subject. There are as many different opinions on writing and and ways to write it as there are to have it. And that's totally okay. But I think there are some basics no matter how you do it. Write it, that is. I'm not stupid enough to presume to tell people how to have sex.

1. Learn the anatomy.
Nothing yanks me from a story faster than misuse of the word "vagina." A vagina is not the external sex characteristic. When a character incorrectly identifies his partner's anatomy in this most basic way, it calls everything into question. If he doesn't know where her vagina is, how am I supposed to believe he's going to please her?

2. Learn the slang for the anatomy.
Unless it's in-character, chances are your character isn't going to think "vagina." S/he might think "penis" but "vagina" is the sort of word that, for some reason, makes people squeamish. There's a wealth of resources for learning appropriate slang out there. (I like this one.) Find those resources and use them.

Note: Vajayjay is not ever, not even a little bit, not even jokingly acceptable. Don't make me bitchslap you.

3. Mind your hands.
This happens frequently in fanfiction, but professional fiction certainly isn't immune: someone has three hands. Or the positioning just isn't physically possible, or someone left their shoes on but five minutes later--without any mention of having removed said shoes--toes are getting sucked. Just pay attention to your details. During editing, position yourself where you've got your characters. If you can't do it, they can't do it.

4. Nothing tastes like peaches and cinnamon.
Several years ago, this was a big problem in fandom, particularly in the Harry Potter fandom. It stemmed, mostly, from people who were not old enough to have even really experienced their own bodies writing terrible smut. Again, professional fiction is not immune. Something might taste almost pleasant or have a hint of flavor of the food the character has been eating, but nothing coming out of the lower regions is going to taste like peaches or cinnamon or cherries. Don't sugar-coat it. (However, you can have your characters actually sugar coat it. Flavored lubricant is pretty nifty.)

5. The big O.
Fact: up to 75% of women do not orgasm during intercourse. If your heroine were in the real world, she probably wouldn't reach that peak. It's okay to have her do it, anyway, because fiction is fantasy. But it's okay if she doesn't, too. Sex isn't always just about the orgasm and if your character is a "journey is half the fun" type, it's completely okay for her to miss that climax. Men don't always achieve orgasm, either. Sometimes, they even fake it. If you're writing sex as part of a larger story (and not, like me and other porn writers, writing it because it is the story), then it adds a touch of unusual realism to have your character skip the big O... and who knows, you might make readers for life for that little detail.

6. You have five senses, use them.
Sex is about more than touch. It's sight, smell, sound, and taste. Just keep that in mind when your characters are getting hot and heavy. Of course they're not going to notice everything--nobody does--but showing us what they do notice, and what they savor, is going to tell us a lot about them.

7. Don't sacrifice character.
Out-of-character sex is just as bad as any other out-of-character behavior. If a hero of few words is suddenly spewing erotic terms of endearment, or a shy, repressed virgin turns into a wanton woman the second the hero drops his pants, I am going to call bullshit, roll my eyes, and close the book. Make me believe it, damn it.

8. There's nothing wrong with porn.
Written porn, at least, hurts no one. Oh, it might upset some people, and it might make others uncomfortable, but written porn for the sake of porn is--in my world--perfectly acceptable. If you want to write sex not because it's part of a larger story or because it shows or tells something, if you want to write sex simply because you want to do it, then do it. It's okay.

9. If you don't think it's hot, your reader won't think it's hot.
This maybe should be my number one tip. It's the one thing I preach whenever asked about it. Write what you think is hot because if you're not enjoying it, that shows in your words, and you ruin things for your character and the reader. You really don't want that.

Bonus Thing: The rules for writing sex, like any writing rules, can be broken. Just not until you learn them.

But I really will come bitchslap you if you use "vajayjay."

SitRep Saturday: Writing!

Writing! Seriously, that's all I've been doing all week. I made it through two short-story drafts, several novelette/novella outlines, a week's worth of 750 Words, and I started a massive file meant to help me really clean up my business plan. I've been using yarny, reading blog posts, and doing tons of research for my stories and for my writing blog over on tumblr (Fuck Yeah Write Life in case you were curious). I have been writing like crazy. And it feels so, so good.

Writer's Resource: 750 Words

One of the things I did on my vacation was learn about new writing resources. I stumbled across a blog and on this blog, people were discussing the various programs and sites they use to write and stay organized. So I made a list and started checking them out.

The first site on my list was 750 Words. It's a simple, no-frills site designed to help you write your three daily pages. (You know, the three pages you're supposed to write every morning on whatever is on your mind.)

I love it. I love how neat and tidy the site is. I love how easy it is to sit down and write, distraction-free. I love that it's private and online. I love the point system. I love the little badges I earn for writing. I've been writing for 23 days, typically do so in the wee hours of the morning, and tend to finish my words in about eleven minutes without distraction, so I've earned up to a flamingo, plus a night bat, a hamster, and a leopard. I love the word count feature. I love the general encouraging atmosphere of the place.

Actually, it has inspired me to see if I can complete a NaNoWriMo challenge. I'm going to do a test run next month and see if I can write 50,000 words in one month. (I'm hoping to pound out two novellas.) If I can, I might actually take on NaNo this year. I've never felt brave enough to sign up for NaNoWriMo, so just the fact that I'm seriously considering it, I think, speaks volumes about the wonder of the 750 Words site.

Try it. I don't think you'll be disappointed.

Nine Writing Things: Characterization Exercises

One of the things I find incredibly useful to do is write characterization exercises. (Or detail exercises, or dialogue exercises, or activity exercises.) These generally don't get shared because they're not usually pretty, but mostly because they're just not meant for others' eyes. Writing exercises like these help you find your voice and develop a strategy for dealing with some aspect of your writing in a larger, meant-for-publication piece. I suggest picking a word count--500, 1000, or 2000 words are good numbers--and going for it.

1. A car breakdown.
The way a person behaves when their car breaks down tells you a lot about them and their history. Is this a regular occurrence? Are they used to it? Did they prepare for it? Where it happens can provide a nice exploration of character. Is it on the side of the road between cities? In a bad part of town? Near home?

2. Preparing for a parent's visit/going to visit parents or in-laws.
Unless your character is a single orphan, family will probably visit her at some point. Or she'll visit family. It doesn't have to be an overnight visit. Maybe her dad and his new wife are just popping in on their way to dinner, or maybe her mother-in-law is doing one of those surprise inspections on the new housewife. Whatever the case, there's a lot of emotion and a lot of character rolled up in how we deal with parental figures. 

3. A first date.
I'll confess: I hate dating. I went on maybe four dates during my "high school" years and I didn't date at all in college or for about a year and a half after college. And even then, I got married eleven weeks after meeting a guy (ten weeks after our first date). But I hear some people like it. And I understand that most people don't meet someone and decide to marry them three weeks later. A first date for your character is kind of the same thing as a first date for you. You're going to learn a lot about them based on how they present themselves, what they worry about, what they ask, what they notice.

4. A job interview.
This is sort of the same as a first date, just with an added layer of professionalism. Is your character prepared for the interview? What does she wear? How does she feel? What does she say? What's her attitude about being there? (Is she being herself or is she trying to be what the interviewer wants?) Does she need the job? Does she want the job? A job interview for a character will probably show you how she behaves in the most stressful of non-intimate situations.

5. The first time your character had sex.
This is an old one and maybe kind of cliche, but it's a good one. You remember your first time. It's kind of a defining moment in a person's life. Your character is a person. And, not to get too triggery here, but if your character's first time wasn't consensual, or if your character's first time was maybe plagued with doubt and regret, you're going to learn a lot about him.

6. Doing something that frightens her.
I am utterly, completely terrified of "fun" houses. You know the ones. With the mirrors. Or the dark ones with the people in costumes who don't touch you but make damn sure they chase you. Shaking, crying, full-on panic attacks. Which is weird for me, because I am the least-easily-frightened person I know. This includes my Army husband and retired Navy/cop father. Bugs? Icky, but okay. Snakes? Respect 'em. Bad guys? Try me, buddy. I've been through a lot of very real, very scary stuff in my life. But fun houses reduce me to a small, scared, whimpering child. Throwing a character into a situation that scares her is going to reveal a lot about who she is and some of the most primal inner workings of her mind.

7. Winning the lottery.
It's an ultimate fantasy situation, like getting a chance to spend the night with your favorite celebrity (*coughTimArmstrongcoughyesIknowIammarriedandnoitdoesnotreallymatterIwouldtotallyhitthatcough*). But if you take the fantasy part out of it, there's some real conflict there. How does she react when she finds out? What does she do with the money? Who does she tell? How does she react to people coming out of the woodwork? Does it help or hurt her goals in life?

8. Home alone on a dark and stormy night.
Come on, even the bravest and most jaded among us can get a little spooked all alone in a big, drafty, silent house in the middle of a terrible storm. Or maybe she likes to cuddle up on the couch with fuzzy slippers and hot chocolate and read herself Edgar Allan Poe. The point is, it's a mini-isolation exercise. How does your character fare, think, act when she's completely alone?

9. Confronting someone who has wronged her.
Is she into the guns-blazing kind of confrontation? Is she subtle and manipulative, drawing out the confession before she acts? Is she passive-aggressive? Is she passive? Is she aggressive? Does she have control or does she let her anger/hurt control her? Confrontation is powerful. Facing the person who has done you wrong is a highly-charged moment. Is she a fighter or a flier? Write and find out!

Monday Miscellany: Ways To Write

Did you guys have any idea that there are, like, a million programs out there for writers? I'm not talking research or printing or formatting programs, I'm talking word processors and storyboards and research consolidators. Incredibly useful programs. And a lot of them are free or inexpensive! I certainly didn't. I've been limping along with Works, Word, or OpenOffice (with the occasional foray into Notepad, WordPad, or a blogging platform like LiveJournal or tumblr) or I've been going the old-fashioned route and using pen and paper since I started writing. (There was also a DOS-based word processor way, way back in the day. I used to journal like Doogie Howser and Dana Scully on the very first computer my family ever owned. No, I wasn't even ten years old yet.)

I knew about Write or Die. I actually bought it last month and it feels super awesome to meet my goals in that program and hear the fanfare. I didn't know about programs like ZenWriter, yarny, yWrite, or Scrivener. There are more, too, apparently. I've barely scratched the surface. But for right now, these are the programs I'm checking out and testing.

One of my new muses is determined to turn me into a real novel writer. I've tried before and, I feel, failed miserably, so right now I'm taking baby steps. Playing to my strengths, doing a lot of research, and thinking about word counts. I've begun work on two novels, the vampire one--The Guest--and a fantasy novel--The Lost Princess (Returns? I haven't decided quite on a title)--and despite my short attention span, I'm not rushing anything. Programs like yarny, yWrite, and Scrivener are designed for novel-writing. So far, my favorite is yarny, but, then again, I haven't spent much time with yWrite and Scrivener yet.

As for ZenWriter, I have the feeling this could be very, very useful. I just haven't found the perfect situation for it to be useful.

Some of it may be because I'm so used to plain old word processors. Teaching yourself to use new programs can be tricky and frightening and human nature seems to resist change. That doesn't mean we can't learn to change... or use spiffy new writing programs that make our lives much easier.

Nine Writing Things: Tips for Self-Editing

I've written about self-editing before and I'm positive I'll do it again. I'll probably even repeat myself. Self-editing is a crucial step in the writing process and learning to do it well will save you--and your editors and beta-readers--a lot of headaches.

1. Read it out loud.
Listen to the flow of sentences, your word choices, and your dialogue. Reading aloud also helps you find those missing words you thought you wrote but totally didn't.

2. Have it read to you.
Back in the days before on-screen readers, I used to have my youngest sister read my fanfiction to me. Now, you can just save your file as a PDF and have Adobe Acrobat read it to you.

3. Read it backwards.
This step is useful for spelling errors more than anything else. Start at the end of your document and read backwards, one word at a time. It might also help you see if you fall into the trap of using the same vague words more toward the end of the text, when perhaps you're tired and frustrated and not as fresh and excited as you were at the beginning.

4. Find and replace "problem" words.
First you have to identify your problem words, which I would define as words you use excessively. I like to do a quick find-and-replace and substitute an all-caps version of the word for the word itself, that way my eyes catch on it and when I'm looking at the document as a whole, I can see the placement of the words. After that, I go in, look at, and edit each instance of each word.

5. Find and replace pronouns, and, then, as, like, was, were.
I like to get a sense of how often I use s/he, his/her/its, him/her/it, and the rest. I copy #4 for this tip.

6. Ignore it.
Sometimes, ignoring it is all you can do. The longer the work, the longer your break should be. When you come back to it, you'll see it with fresh eyes and read it with new understanding.

7. Save it somewhere else and read it from there.
If you write on your laptop, read it on your Kindle or iPad. Print it out and read it on the back porch with a glass of wine. Change your surroundings to jar you into seeing the piece differently.

8. Change font, size, color.
Simple tweaks like using a font you don't normally like in a larger or smaller size or different color can change the way you see the manuscript.

9. Read it as a reader, not as a writer.
Turn off your inner editor and just start reading. Don't do any editing until after you've consumed the work as a reader.

Nine Writing Things: Reasons to Write

There are millions and millions of reasons to write. Seriously, a basic Google search turned up 210,000,000. Today, I have nine for you. These are some of my reasons. (Reasons like "because I want to think about [interchangeable male character] naked" and "to evict old story ideas and clear out space in my head" didn't make the list. Sorry.) Maybe you can identify with them. Maybe you think I'm crazy. Maybe you're someone I know here to find out why I do what I do. Maybe I'll just make you feel better about your own reasons to write because yours are better.

1. There's something missing in your life.
New romance. Adventure. Attractive naked men doing your bidding. Zombie killing. Flying cars. Attractive naked men pulling pranks on other attractive naked men that lead to naked oil wrestling. What? I'm sorry. The point is, writing is a great way to get something you feel is missing from your life.

2. To live more than one life.
I like my life. It's pretty cool. I've got a hot husband, a smart kid, a great family, awesome friends, and some hobbies and interests that keep me entertained. But it's only one life. I'm not a spy or a supervillain or a hooker or a vampire or a dominatrix or a commando or a werewolf hunter. Writing lets me be those other things without giving up the comfort and safety of my relatively boring life.

3. Catharsis.
Sometimes, bad things happen. Sometimes, really bad things happen. And sometimes, the best way to deal with those really bad things is to just write about them. Make someone else--your characters--deal with the situation and you can deal with it, too.

4. To give voice to the characters in your head.
Most writers I know are not alone in their heads. We've all got a pretty solid grip on reality, don't get me wrong, but there's no way I could talk to my mother or husband about the harem of muses without them looking at me like I'm nuts and scheduling me a visit with the head shrinker. Characters are born and grow up and have adventures and become real in a writer's mind. They deserve to have their stories told. 

5. To figure something out.
Dump your characters into a problem situation and let them figure it out. Or set up a conversation so the characters can talk out a problem until they come to a solution. Sometimes, this is the best way to figure out real-life things.

6. To do something you really want to do but can't.
Do you really really want to go skydiving but can't because you're pregnant? Or maybe you really really want to see the surface of the moon but you can't build a spaceship because you're terrible at math. Everyone wants to do something they can't do, either because they're physically limited or because they're scared of the social consequences. Writing helps you do those things. It certainly helps me.

7. To escape.
When I was a kid and teenager, I used writing in the same way I used reading: it was a nice escape. It still works. Sometimes, you just need to get away from your life and writing is a really good way to do that. When you write, you create your new, perfect world.

8. To give voice to things you can't say in your normal life.
Social pressure is tough. Propriety keeps us from telling that horrible woman we work with that she needs to feed herself to a ravenous horde of Danny Boyle zombies. Fear keeps us from telling the adorable barista that you want to bite his biceps. But you can do those things in your writing. Not that I know this from personal experience or anything.

9. For fun.
And sometimes writing is just like arts and crafts or playing video games or going to the movies or doing a crossword puzzle. Sometimes, the best reason to do it just because you want to have some fun. There's nothing quite as awesome as endless possibilities, and that's exactly what you get when you write.

Nine Writing Things: How To Write Men (If You're A Woman)

In As Good As It Gets, Julie Benz's character asks Jack Nicholson's character how he writes women so well. "I think of a man," he says. "And I take away reason and accountability." Ouch. How do you write men if you're a woman, then? Here are nine of the tips I've found most useful in my years of experience writing men. Do I have all the answers? No. But I have been complimented by actual men on getting male characters "right," so I feel like I have some authority. 

1. Watch the men in your life.
My dad, my grandfather, my husband, my male friends... They're excellent sources of how "real" men behave. They're just regular guys, the sort of men most of us are likely to encounter in daily life. The little things can tell you a lot about how they think and what they feel. Writing a romance? The way these men show the women in their lives that they care can be revealing and useful.

2. Remember that men are really simple creatures.
This isn't to say that a man can't be complex, but as with any character, you start with the basics. And men, generally, need three things: to be fed, to be fucked, and to be respected. Conflict arises whenever he's not getting one of those three things. (Alternatively, when writing women, I believe the basics are that women need to be loved, listened to, and needed.) Hunger can be about more than food, sex can be about more than physical release, and respect doesn't have to come from the community.

3. Watch movies targeted at men.
The kind of entertainment targeted at the type of character you want to write tells you what people in charge think about him. The really popular movies tell you about the men enjoying them. What they like, even why they like it, and what it says about who they are and what they deal with in their daily life. Entertainment is a form of escapism and knowing how men escape can give you clues about the day-to-day conflicts. (For example, as an archaeologist, I believe in the whole men are hunters thing--which, to me, explains why so many movies aimed at men feature weapons and a hunt of some sort. Most men these days don't get a lot of that in their day to day life.)

4. Read books targeted at men.
For the same reasons you'll watch movies targeted at men, read their books. Not sure which ones those are based on the bestseller lists? Ask the men in your life what they're reading or what they'd read if they had a chance. (My husband, for example, reads a lot of John Grisham, David Baldacci, James Patterson, and he hasn't missed a Tucker Max book yet. In my experience, men tend toward dramatic non-fiction or nearly-non-fiction, "crude" humor, and sex.)

5. Read magazines targeted at men.
Magazines have a flashier, more immediate feel. I know more men reading magazines than I do men reading books, to be honest. This suggestion isn't just for the mature-themed magazines, like Playboy and Maxim (though those really are useful for the articles; Playboy was where a lot of masculine cultural revolution began, and Maxim is as much about clothing and gear and being a modern man as it is about attractive women in skimpy clothing). Look at any magazine that targets a specifically male audience. 

6. Read up on your male gender studies.
In this case, "gender" is the operative word. Manhood as a state of mind is something you want to at least vaguely understand before you tackle writing them. What do men want? How do they think? What do they feel? How does culture affect these things? What does it mean to be a man in his world? Generalized studies can help. Women's studies in the west tend to focus on things like "being pinked." Men are subjected to cultural restrictions and expectations as women. 

7. Replace "I feel" with "I think."
This is probably the easiest tip. Anytime you have a character speaking or internal monologuing, replace every instance of "I feel" with "I think" and your man will automatically seem more manly. This isn't to say that men don't feel; they're just more likely to phrase it in terms of what they think.

8. Ask a man in your life to read the dialogue aloud.
My darling husband is more romantic than me. He's the most romantic person I know. And even still, I sincerely doubt he'd say any of the flowery things I sometimes catch modern heroes spouting in romance novels. If you're uncertain about your dialogue, bribe a man in your life if you have to. (I hear a good way to get to them is through their stomachs.)

9. Remember that men are active and solution-oriented.
Men like to be doing something. It doesn't even necessarily have to be useful, though that's a bonus. And men typically aren't going to spend three hundred pages wringing their hands over a problem. They're going to be actively seeking solutions. This isn't to say that men aren't introspective, because they certainly are, they just prefer a more active approach to problem-solving, and life in general.

Nine Writing Things: Confessions

We all have them. Our dirty little writing confessions. Well, I'm going to share some of mine today.

1. I like dialogue tags that aren't "said" and I use them wherever and however I please. I also skip dialogue tags altogether, as often as I can, because if my reader gets confused then I haven't done my job and I suck.

2. I like adverbs and, like dialogue tags that aren't "said," I use them however and wherever I please. Of course, in editing, I do a search for words that end in "-ly" and if they hurt more than they help, they get cut.

3. I actually really hate dialogue. It's so hard to write and it interrupts the interesting part of the story and it just irritates me. I hate it especially in sex scenes. In fact, if it weren't so useful, I wouldn't use it at all. It just happens to be useful for characterization and plot development.

4. I don't like naming characters. At all. For many years, I flat-out refused to do it. I only do it now because, like dialogue, it's useful. I tend to choose names from the American Social Security Administration lists unless a character names herself.

5. I don't share everything I write, I don't finish everything I write, and I love writing what I've seen referred to as "masturbatory fantasies." I am not ashamed.

6. I don't want to be a world-famous bestselling writer. I want to be a reasonably successful reliable writer, the sort of writer you can turn to when you want something specific because you know she'll deliver.

7. Sometimes I wonder why I write. It's hard, it's frustrating, it's time-consuming, it's nerve-wracking, it's exhausting. And then I remember that if I don't write, I'll have all these stories floating around in my head with nowhere to go.

8. I can't stand cliches, but sometimes they're useful. And I hate that. I prefer every word I use to be useful and I don't like relying too much on readers' understanding of linguistic cliches. Not everyone really knows what they mean and while I like a challenge in my recreational reading, I don't want to make people feel stupid.

9. I don't think I'm as good as I'll ever be. I'm always trying to get better.

Monday Miscellany: News Roundup

Time for bullet points!

• If you're on tumblr and you're looking for a reader's blog to follow, this is me. If you're on tumblr and you have a reading/reader's blog, please let me know so I can follow you.
• All of my books are now available at AllRomance! Cass Gets Her Kicks, The Cowboy Next Door, Better with You, Please, Sir, One Good Cowboy, and Right This Time are available in PDF, HTML, PRC, and EPUB formats.
• I'm already about halfway through the draft of my next project, an anthology of three ~5,000 word short stories. The first one, set in Venice, is drafted... and it is good.
• This week, I am determined to finish the formatting guide. Expect that. And a post on sales, if I can get to it.
• Man, I want to write a zombie story. Bad.